Most people, if not all, love surprises. Heck, I know I do. Although not all suprises are necessarily good, they all come to you with a sort of shock or excitement.
I think a word related to "surprise" is "mystery." Having a secret or keeping something from someone comes as a surprise once it is revealed. Many people conceal things about themselves in order to be "mysterious", "spontaneous", and "unsuspecting". Many of these said people want to show how different they are, how many secrets they keep, and how extremely interesting they are. They are mysterious so they are able to hide much and to surprise people at any given moment.
I am, by no means, condemning mystery. I used to be very attracted to people who seemed to harbour much dark mystery around themselves. I loved the way that you never quite knew what was up with them and how they would keep you guessing. Conversations with them were usually very exciting because you'd always feel you were getting closer and closer to knowing this person. Someone who just says completely honestly who they are leaves us with less of a challenge.
Mystery is fun, but what I've realized lately is that people who are so-called "mysterious" more often than not really play up the act. Mysterious people simply want to be perceived as intriguing, interesting, and who others regard in awe.
Unfortunately, I'll have to admit that I myself am still a little awed by mystery. Well, I am sure we all do like a little mystery and surprise. I suppose I am more referring to people who are coined as "mysterious". There is something quite appealing to having to figure out the mystery... and there really is something attractive on not quite knowing what the person will do next.
But, frankly, I'm tired of it now. Although I still kinda sorta like it, I am moving farther and farther away from it. I find people go out of their way to appear to be "mysterious", and that can be downright irritating. I am realizing that I really like honesty, and I like to be able to laugh with someone, make fun of them, and exchange jokes and anecdotes. It's difficult to do that with a "mysterious" person because they cannot and do not show much of themselves. The unfortunate part is that it can really inhibit a friendship from growing.
Heinrich Heine, born right after the French Revolution, was a very influential German political poet. He was a very interesting man -- very literate and well read. He wrote quite beautiful poems, whilst at the same time commenting on the social and political situation. The funny thing about him is that he surrounded himself all of his life in mystery. He often made up historical facts and would embellish things just to make himsself more interesting. He would tell people that he slept with all of these girls, even though he didn't. He even tried to convince people that he got syphilis (which was something to be proud of then, if you were "that" type of guy), just to prove as to how many girls he had been with. He was a guy who apparently enjoyed having people talk about him, especially if it was about something scandalous.
The other night, I was at a drama party quoted "for drama majors, drama minors, and everything in between". Since I was part of the latter gourp, I was allowed to attend. I had a very good time, although I witnessed a strange three-way kiss. Anyway, I was outside getting a breath of fresh air at some point with some people. As soon as we stepped outside, this guy asked us if we had a cigarette.
He looked down melancholy and started rubbing his knuckles frantically.
Um, are you okay? one of the guys asked. He said "yes" under his breath, walked up to the door, opened it with a flair, and dramatically walked back into the bar.
Pfff! I started chuckling. Oh, what drama!
I just shook my head at the absurdity of it all. So many people, guys especially, in the drama department strive to be the most mysterious and emotionally deep people in the world. A lot of girls go for that, so that is perhaps why they do it. I find it funny, more than anything. Who are they kidding?
A few years ago, a psychology major was thinking on doing her thesis on finding connections between drama kids and emotional trauma as youth. She never did do it, but I doubt she would actually find anything. Remember, for many drama people, life is a show, so they have no problems hamming it up!
Oh, and I should point out now that I do not include myself in the "drama people" or "drama kids" groups. So, I should also mention that not all theatre inclined people are in those groups either.
Now, let me end this entry with a quote from our ever so loved, Heinrich Heine:
"Love is a matter of money, not heart."
Ha! It reminded me of a certain couple I know in which the girl does not want to get married unless it is for money. Too bad I can't make this work with Leonard Cohen anymore.